The anticipation of the coming of a new baby into this world is almost too much to bear. Often eagerness and anxiety overwhelm the thoughts of the parents-to-be. Then, something remarkable happens. When they hold their baby for the first time, the fear fades. Instead, they are overcome with adoration and love for their tiny little human.
We endured the same emotions during our adoption process. In fact, our feelings were heightened due to literally having days to prepare for our life changing event.
It was a regular old Thursday. I was a nanny at the time for a darling family when I received a call. It was our adoption agency.
“There’s a baby,” the gentleman from our agency explained.
It took me a moment to process what I heard. We were approved for adoption only four months prior and told it would probably be about a year of waiting, so I was stunned.
“There are issues, though. She had a traumatic birth….” he continued, although, the rest was a blur.
Oh, a baby girl.
My heart was hers.
We had to wait four LONG days to meet her. We entered the Henry Ford Hospital in Detroit, Michigan, a place we would spend A LOT of time at for the next couple of months. Our anticipation was palpable as we walked the halls to our destination, the NICU.
She was in an incubator, connected to what seemed to be countless wires. I didn’t notice the dire atmosphere, as the nurses introduced us to her. All I noticed was her. She was beautiful. She was perfect.
As I held her, we were approached by nurses and doctors informing us of her condition and the possible outcomes due to her traumatic birth. They were giving us every opportunity to walk away, but we just couldn’t. We loved her and she was our daughter.
The same day we had the pleasure of meeting her birth mom, or tummy mommy as we call her. She was bubbly, happy and doing incredibly well for having an emergency C-section the week prior. A moment that could have been terribly uncomfortable, just wasn’t. It was beautiful. The room we were in seemed almost overwhelmingly filled with love and gratitude. I sat in awe of this woman. She was already a mother to a four-year-old and just unable to care for her newborn, so she chose adoption. Her selflessness was admirable and something I don’t know if I can ever comprehend. In a city where abortions run rampant, she chose life. She chose to give us the opportunity to become parents. She chose to give her baby girl a chance.
I won’t lie, our life is challenging. It is filled with IEP meetings, making sure she’s in an appropriate classroom for her needs, therapy, prepping her for ANY and EVERYTHING out of the norm, behavioral plan meetings, specialists after specialist appointments, singing, dancing, hugging, crying, screaming, pulling hair, scratching, meltdowns, emotions. So. Many. Emotions.
Life was simple before she made her entrance into this world. Into our world. She has changed my life. She has helped me become more self-aware, compassionate, understanding and quicker to love rather than judge. She filled a void with her beautiful, scrunchy noise smile. Our life might be more peaceful and easier if she wasn’t a part of it, BUT we would be missing out on one of the sweetest, most loving, and infectiously happy little girl.
Thank you for changing my life, Brynn. It is fuller because of you. My heart is yours forever. Happy 6th Birthday, baby girl! I love you!
SIDE NOTE: No, this is not me pushing my political views down your throat. Yes, I consider myself Pro-Life, but I also believe abortions should be legal and available to women for certain circumstances. I am a HUGE believer in adoption and the life changing effects it has on lives. I just hope and pray they will become more affordable for those truly yearning for a child they can love and care for.